While being a woman has many advantages, there are things we encounter while running that men fortunately do not have to contend with.
- Boob Issues – Whether they are double Ds or small Bs, breasts can pose a problem when running. First of all, they move all over the place and sometimes hit you in the face. They can cause back pain. They require a good quality bra to tame them and hold them in place. They sweat and create cleavage moisture. The nips get hard with exertion and sometimes poke through. If, by chance, you are lactating, bless you. You will likely finish your run with two perfectly round and moist circles on your running shirt.
- Peeing Sitting Down – One of the great disadvantages to being a girl is not being able to whip it out and pee standing up. This condition can cause penis envy in some women. We are cursed with the need to not only squat, but show our bare asses while doing it. Granted, you can try to do the old “pull the short of your crotch aside and pee” thing, but this usually results in peeing on oneself. Another option is the GoGirl. This is a device you can carry with you and press to your lady area when you need to pee. This enables you to actually urinate standing up.
- Long Hair – These days many women have long hair. This means that we have hair that needs to be tamed while we run. This requires all kinds of buns, ponytails, braids and headbands. Unlike those short-haired men, we cannot just head out the door without giving attention to our long locks.
- That Damn Period – Bleeding every 28 days from one’s private parts is an unfortunate and unfair condition that we women face. While having a period means we can have babies, it is still a pain in the ass. If you are like me, you might actually schedule your running races, vacations and sexual escapades around that time of the month. Yes, wearing tampons can make this whole mess easier, but it is still something we need to plan and think about.
- Safety Concerns – Whether we like to admit it or not, women are less safe while running than men. We need to constantly be aware of our surroundings, tell our loved ones where we are running, carry pepper spray and avoid running at night. This is our reality and one that we need to take seriously. However, it is certainly unfortunate.
- Frequent Cat Calls – Personally I don’t get many of these (I’m old and flat chested), but I know many women who receive them on a daily basis. These calls can originate from construction sites, cars at stoplights and strip clubs (if you happen to incorporate a strip club into your daily running route). My guess is that cat calls are not as numerous for men. I suppose it depends on the city.
- The Front Wedgie – Running often requires tights or capri leggings. It is incredibly difficult to keep that spandex from creeping into your lady parts. The result? The dreaded camel toe.
Given the above seven obstacles, if you are a woman and you run, you are a badass. Keep doing what you are doing. Don’t let a few annoying issues keep you from doing what you love to do. Remember — at least you don’t have to wear a jockstrap.