10 THINGS YOU’LL NEVER HEAR AN INJURED RUNNER SAY

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People who love to run will tell you there are not many downsides to the sport. Running clears your head and gives you perspective. It helps promote and maintain weight loss. It keeps you in shape and from losing your mind.

However, if you have been running long enough, you have probably been sidelined due to some ache or pain that forced you to take some dreaded time off from running. Injury is not a four-letter word — but it should be. While you are recovering from said injury, there are many things you will say ($@*&!!) and do (drink tequila) to cope. But here are some things you’ll never hear an injured runner say:

  1. “I’m so glad to be injured because now I have more time for knitting.”
  2. “I have absolutely no impulse to trip that smiling runner with my crutches.”
  3. “I love spending my money on physical therapy, anti-inflammatory medications and MRIs. Much better than race entries or new running shoes.”
  4. “My Aunt Gertrude was right! It turns out running isn’t good for me.”
  5. “Wow! Who knew that putting on a flotation belt and running in the deep end of the pool was so much more invigorating than running outside!?”
  6. “This injury is a blessing! I didn’t really want to do that marathon I had been training my butt off for over the last six months.”
  7. “These mundane and repetitive strengthening exercises I have to do for recovery are incredibly inspiring and exhilarating.”
  8. “I think I will call up my friend and see how wonderful her long run on the beach was today.”
  9. “Now that I am unable to run, I love how snug my jeans are.”
  10. “What a relief to not have so much laundry to do!

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